"I'll give you $5 if you do a keg-stand"
Let he who is without sin cast the first stone...
OK, so the kid was only 14 years old and yes, I am 22 years older than he is, but $5 is $5. He showed me the fin, a neutral party held it, and I fulfilled my end of the bargain. The kid learned something that will make him immensely popular in college, the rest of the BBQ patrons witnessed my return to glory, and I went home $5 on the plus side. Everybody was a winner tonight. I ask you, dear reader, are you still able to chug beer while inverted?
"ohhh, Quagmire, I choose not to chug beer upside down. I've matured past the mental age of 19."
To all the 19-year-old hottie girls reading this (and I know there must be thousands of you), I'm right in your mental sweet-spot. So how about hitting that little email button down at the bottom of this page and let's set up a little sum'n-sum'n.
Now to this side of reality:
I reserved a U-Haul for the move to NY today. The smallest and cheapest truck available for a California to NY move is $1600. That really hurts. Perhaps one of the three of you who read these little missives can suggest alternate moving strategies. Seriously, at this point, I'm considering jumping onto a boxcar with the barest of necessities and hoboing it to NY.
Well, that's about it. No more to see here. You don't need to see my identification. These aren't the droids you're looking for. Move along, move along.
posted by Quagmire @ 1:18 AM
5 Comments:
It's all good fun until some little cutie breaks her nose.
Quagmire, check into trucking companies. I had a client who owns a trucking company drop a 52-foot semi trailer in my driveway in the BDC. I filled it up with the contents of our house, and I loaded my car on it. His driver hauled it from the BDC all the way to Montana.
I got some kids and Forest Service workers to unload it.
It was $ 2200.
Alternately, I will drop you my sister, L's, email. She moved from NYC back to LA a year and a half ago. She had a small apartment and rented space on a semi trailer. She just boxed and shrink-wrapped her shit, and they loaded it and drove it.
(PS Go to Staples and get the big roll of shrink wrap. That shit is a scientific marvel, much like your brain. Plus, it is kind of fun.)
Hey bro,
Be gentle, "Gentle" with those keg stands. As The Bignasty says, you could get dropped right on your fricking nose.
Sorry - I have no advice for the move out. Unless you want to give up all your posessions.
Just did the Jersey to San Diego move. I rented a "Pod", a 10x10 space in a semi for around $1100. I forget the name of the company but just type moving pods into google and you should come up with any number of campanies. I had to load and unload it but for the price you couldn't beat it.
haikus
Gentle on her hands
drinking beer while inverted
the keg rim is hard
tap between your lips
two drunks hold your legs aloft
drop you on your nose
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